The Mental Health Gap: What Parents Miss and Teens Need
September 1, 2025
Your teen says they’re fine. But they’ve stopped texting friends, spend more time in their room, and their grades are slipping. Could you spot the signs if they were struggling? Only 58% of U.S. teenagers feel they get the emotional support they need—yet 93% of parents believe they’re providing enough.
Findings like these show that parents may not always realize when their child is struggling. Young people today face different challenges than their parents and previous generations did. More than ever, parents must understand the unique pressures young people are struggling with today.
Challenges Faced by Teens
Nearly 10% of all U.S. kids aged 3 to 17 experience anxiety, while 5% live with depression. A few causes are listed below:
- Many young people are dealing with packed schedules, the pressure to succeed in academics, sports, and extracurriculars, and the uncertainty of what comes after graduation. The pressure to excel can lead to burnout.
- With in-person learning, the fear of school shootings can create a general sense of day-to-day unease.
- Students who remember the pandemic lockdown may have posttraumatic stress from virtual learning and social isolation.
- Social media has introduced young people to near-constant comparison, leading to low self-esteem. Body dissatisfaction is leading to a rise in eating disorders.
- Concerns over climate change can also lead to feelings of hopelessness.
Warning Signs
As a parent, you have a good sense of what your child’s “normal” looks like. In addition to the more striking symptoms, such as mood swings, angry outbursts, or being more tearful than usual, you may notice:
- Changes in eating habits, weight, sleep, or other routines
- Loss of interest in the things they once enjoyed or quitting activities
- Withdrawing from close friends or family
- Academic struggles that seem different or more intense, such as a refusal to complete assignments
- Becoming more visibly worried or expressing constant worry
- Any signs of substance abuse or evidence of self-harm, such as cuts, burns, or bruises
Just because your child exhibits any of these symptoms does not mean they are experiencing a mental health crisis. Biological changes, including hormonal shifts that all teenagers must go through, can affect their mood and school performance.
“It’s kind of hard because these things correlate with puberty,” says Theresa Nguyen, vice president of policy and programs at Mental Health America. “It gets hard for parents because this period of time is so muddy.”
Converse Differently
Checking in with your child is an ongoing process, not a one-time occurrence. Normalizing regular conversations with your child supports their mental health and also gives them the foundation to come to you when they need help.
Kids avoid touchy subjects, especially if they fear being lectured or punished. Make sure your children know they can come to you with anything. Create a safe space for them by remaining approachable and nonreactive. Routine moments, such as car rides or dinner times, can be opportunities for discussion.
Avoid forcing conversations or asking direct questions like, “What’s wrong?” Instead, ask about specific things at school or what they might be looking forward to. They will be more willing to open up if they do not feel interrogated. Try listening more than you speak and resist the urge to give advice immediately.
The goal is not to fix everything for them, but to make sure they know they are supported. “As parents, our instinct is often to jump in with advice, but it’s very rare that that’s what teens are looking for,” says Lisa Damour, a clinical psychologist. “Teenagers often feel supported not through a conversation but through our steady presence. It’s about being around and available.”
Parents can show their teen how to care for their mental health by modeling those healthy behaviors themselves.
- Encourage good physical habits. Eat well and encourage exercise, both of which can be activities you do together. Every family member should have a bedtime and sleep routine.
- Limit screen time and social media. If your teen is resistant, approach it together as an experiment to see if it’s beneficial to take a break.
- Find activities that you enjoy and help them do the same. Ideally, you can find a few things to enjoy together, such as going for walks or watching movies.
“Lead by example,” advises Nguyen.
Your child’s pediatrician can help with any mental health concerns. They can explain treatment options, including medication, and refer you to a specialist for evaluation. Talking with a licensed mental health professional, for instance, can provide teens with a safe and judgment-free zone to process emotions and develop coping skills.
Your child’s care team can develop a crisis plan involving the steps to take if symptoms worsen. There are also courses for parents who want to learn more about mental health first aid. Teens who need to speak with someone immediately may always call The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline or text “TALK” to 741741.
By staying organized, parents can create more time for family. “The single most powerful force for adolescent mental health is strong relationships with caring adults,” says Damour.
Your teen doesn’t need you to have all the answers. They just need to know you’re there every day, without conditions.
At Insureyouknow.org, parents may keep track of their child’s schedule, medical records, and other essential documents.